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The philosopher Epictetus said many years ago , “People are not troubled by things, but rather by the view they take of them.”
It is my guess that many people are at some level aware of this. I suspect most of us can relate to a situation we experienced only to find out afterwards that the same event was seen by other people in a totally different way! If you are interested in leadership and learning then this perceptual difference is very significant. If we want to foster better learning organizations then the quality of our interactions has to allow for the alignment of differing views and perceptions.

Let me give you an example of how powerful differing perceptions can be: when flying in a passenger jet for the first time , one person may be feeling very excited as they are fascinated by the speed and acceleration. In this type of stage, they would be saying to themselves something like: “This is brilliant! , this is exciting , Just feel the thrust of those engines on take-off .” By contrast, another person may be saying to him or herself, “Gosh , those engines are making a lot of noise. Is that rattling sound normal? What if they blow up soon and, when they do, the cockpit will be damaged and we die!” This second persons thinking will trigger an entirely different reaction that of anxiety.

Hopefully this example may seem pretty clear, however it isn’t often recognised that this is the way in which our thinking affects our behaviour. In my experience most people seem to believe that their behaviour and feelings are directly determined by the environment. You might have heard someone say, “If only I was thinner and better looking , then I would be happier.” This type of comment illustrates to me that some people see that their happiness is actually caused by things over which they currently have little or no personal control.

Of course this isnt only true for happiness, it is the case for other feelings as well. You might have said attimes “you made me angry ” or “junk TV relaxes me.” Is this not a really interesting idea to think about? How can it be that a TV set, a collection of electronic circuitry, actually control and influence our feelings? Clearly, this is rubbish, it simply can’t.

Over the last ten years or advances in Brain based learning research is providing compelling evidence that suggests that it is not the outside events that determine our feelings and what we learn, but the way in which we perceive and think about these events that is most critical .
It is not the “team member making their manager angry”, but the managers own generated anger-provoking thoughts when the team member is around. It is our thoughts (even if we arent always aware of them) that precedes our feelings. This is I believe a very empowering fact.

Yes pressure and conflict for leaders is real but what we do with it afterwards is “optional” and depends on the individual leader. If we can’t control the big wide world surely can exercise some control over our own thinking?. Steven Covey summed it up beautifully in his 7 Habits: “Responsibility” the ability to choose our response. If more people understood this concept they could learn to reduce their worries, deal better with change and pressure, support others better and accelerate their ability to learn. Surely that is something worth thinking about for the leaders of today and those of us hoping to build learning organizations?

Graham Hart writes for Leopard learning and is a practitioner and writer in leadership development and learning.
Leopard learning is a free online resource to help provide information and inspiration to help leaders create better learning environments for themselves their teams and their organizations.